The Seeming Oppression of Biblical Womanhood, Part II

Here is the second part of Kim's blog on complementarianism… 

 

 

We obey His commands out of a deep love for Him – because He first loved us. "Beloved, let us love on another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God." We love because He put His love in us, and we know the love of the Father. Author and counselor Elyse Fitzpatrick encourages us with this, "How often do you contemplate God's love for you? I don't mean His love for His chosen ones in general, I mean His love for you personally, a woman made in His image. Do you remember that He chose you out before the foundation of the world? Do you see that your name is eternally inscribed upon the palms of His hands? Do you revel in the compelling love that provides what you needed before you were even aware of your needs? Dear sisters, since God loves us so much, surely we ought to love our husbands." (Helper by Design, 129). The greatest display of that love is the Gospel – the good news that Christ died on a cross on our behalf. Christ died in our place. We couldn't not have died because the guild penalty would not have been covered. But, Christ was our perfect sacrifice. And our adherence to the laws of God, especially in this light of biblical womanhood, have a great reach for the gospel. Carolyn Mahaney puts it this way, "The commands found in Titus 2 have been given to us for an all-important reason that transcends time and culture. That reason is the gospel of Jesus Christ. These virtues are not about our personal fulfillment or individual preference. They are required for the sake of unbelievers – so that those who are lost might come to know our Savior." (Feminine Appeal, 26). If complementarianism seems oppressive, it is the result of sin in the world, not the laws and rules of God in and of themselves. Sin has distorted everything. Three ways I see that sin affects complementarianism is: our own drive toward perfectionism, sinful ruling of man (abuse, tyranny, not loving their wives as Christ loved the church), or legalism (thinking our good behavior will enable our right standing with our Savior). None of these lie at the foundation of complementarianism. All of them lie in the root of sin. Remember, when the roles of men and women were established was in the pre-fall Garden of Eden, not a post-fall Eden. Beth Impson chimes in with "The Fall left us with sin natures, part of which include man's tendency to lord power over the woman in his life and woman's tendency to desire inappropriate control and independence. Redemption in Christ frees us from the power of sin but fleshly patterns and worldly influences can confuse our daily walk and our understanding of the masculine and feminine natures God has given us." (Called to Womanhood, 121) Three take-aways: 1. If single female: pursue Christ. Pursue His Word and how you are to live out your faith, your love of God, and your femininity. 2. If married female: pursue Christ. Don't become discouraged. Love God, love the God who made you exactly who you are, serve as to the Lord. 3. If single males: Encourage your sisters in Christ with the Word – not with man-made laws. Don't expect them to be perfect, none of us are (and women, this goes for you looking for Mr. Right as well, don't expect perfection.) 4. If husbands: love your wives as Christ loved the church, encourage her as your wife. She will not be like someone else's wife – and expectations can be oppressive. Talk about these, open lines of communication, not accusation or disappointment. All (women): live out the truths of Complementarianism (Ephesians 5,1 Peter 3, Titus 2, etc) in light of the Gospel – not the oppression of a sinful society.

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