Fake Fine
Have you ever noticed how we say to kids, "You're ok" when they fall down (and we know they aren't seriously hurt)? We do it to people grieving too... as if somehow, if we pretend the pain and suffering isn't there, it will dissipate and quit reminding us of the brevity of life?I'm wondering - is there a way to suffer publicly AND bring glory to God? Is there a way to walk through the messiness of life without joylessly trudging along nor faking your way through it was a plastered smile? In Matthew 6, Jesus makes a pretty big deal about doing things without others seeing... does this include suffering?
I suppose it depends on your motivation - always the tricky piece...
In this week's reading of Grace for the Good Girl, Emily touches on how we often praise people who don't let on that they are suffering...
I heard it again this week in a sermon on contentment... about people who suffering without a complaint... and something clicked! It's the complaining - the grumbling - the murmuring about our circumstances that's the issue.
Because really - when we fake fine, we just cover up our inner discontentment, don't we? We're just afraid to let on that we are not content in the circumstances the Lord has allowed us to be in. But for me - it's usually because I don't want anyone to know I'm not a better Christian than that... I don't want them to see me struggle - it might damage my reputation.
Ah - but God. He knows the heart. He knows when my mask is really there to cover the symptoms of a sickly heart. One that isn't trusting Him or His providence or His divine sovereignty over my life. He knows that my mask covers a grumbling, murmuring heart that would cause me to fit right in with a bunch of Israelites in the desert.
Psalm 1 has the remedy. Blessed is the one who finds his [her] delight in the law of the Lord... who meditates on it day and night. When I meditate on the Gospel - it reminds me that it is not my strength, reputation or self-sufficiency that conforms me further into His image. He WILL complete the work He began in me... oh to trust Him more.
Hi, My Name is Andrea, and I'm a Martha
As we explored the whole interaction of Jesus with Martha and Mary - I was reminded just what a Martha I am... so task oriented... often wrestling through life in my own strength. "I see myself as irreplaceable when I think the work won't get done unless I do it. Instead of looking to [Jesus] to provide what is needed, Martha rolled up her sleeves and took on responsibility for things that may never have been meant for her."Ouch. That hits a little close to home.
Do I ever do that? You bet! I am guilty.
The past couple years have wrought some painful lessons as I've realized what the practical working out of my theology means. Too often problems have seemed bigger than my Lord.
I used to believe the old saying that "God helps those who help themselves." Too many times have I tried to force MY plan under His hand for a stamp of approval. What would happen if I stopped forcing my plans and listened to and obeyed HIS?
What about you? How do you struggle with self-sufficiency? Hiding behind masks? Pretending you're fine when you aren't? Can't wait to hear from you!
